Monday, November 22, 2010

Martha - Oh how we love to hate you!

Martha, Martha, Martha.....Stewart that is.

We hate her.  But we love her.  We love to hate her.

She makes us feel completely inadequate because we can't all be perfectionist like her.

SUDDEN INTERRUPTION - Have you ever seen her daughters show?  The one where she watches her mom's shows and tears her apart?  It is HILARIOUS!

Anywho...where was I?

Oh, yes.  I don't strive to be like Martha...but if it happened naturally, I wouldn't turn talent like that down. :)

I can you deny talent of a woman who made a lamp out of a gourd....and even made it LOOK GOOD!

Although, Martha, I think I could have lived without the twigs coming out of the top. :\

But, the pinecone THAT Martha, that is ingenious!

Actually Martha, even you surprised me by all your pinecone goodness! 


And then you go and do stuff like this, Martha,and make me feel, once again, completely inadequate.

I mean, Martha!  Gourd Bowls?  Hand made gourd bowls?  Martha...we don't do this in the real world!  And yet....I really want to try!

And ok, pumpkins.  I can totally rock the pumpkin flower planter!

And might even be able to handle the GORGEOUS pumpkin chandelier.

But Martha.....then you go and create....pumpkin sconces!?  For real?  

Wreaths.  Now those are something even I can do.

Like vintage paper wreaths.

Or cornhusk wreaths.

I can definitely handle the fall foliage leaf.

Actually...scratch that!  Those leaves are placed WAY to perfectly!  Nope...can't do the fall foliage wreath.

But cornhusk covered votives!!  I CAN do that!

And an acorn mirror is right up my alley.

But then, Martha.  You go and do this!!!

Cornhusk flowers!  That look almost real!!  I mean, come on Martha!  WHO can do that?

And Martha, sometimes...not always....but I mean, just every once in lose touch with all reality.  Like this...

Martha.  My dear, dear, Martha.  While I appreciate the simplicity of these mini cornucopia favors.  I mean, so simple, yes, even I could do this. 

Hon....really?  As FAVORS?  Decor...maybe.  But....favors?

I'm not sure how I would react to a little 'thing' of NUTS as a gift! 

Not peanuts, Martha.  We're talking....Large honkin', I need special tools, I'm not even sure what to do with them....NUTS!

Martha.....NOBODY wants a tiny little sack of HUGE nuts!  Sorry!

And it's about that time, Martha, that I have issues even MEDS can't help!!

So, if it's ok with you Martha, I think I'll just stay me in my imperfect world. :)

Until next time....


  1. This post made me laugh my head off!! Thank you!

    Yes, Martha's things are perfect and gorgeous....but I know who I'd rather be freidns with...YOU!!

  2. And you're so right...NUTS? What was she thinking???

  3. I agree with you...I'll stay in my imperfect and cluttered world! Now that'd give ol' Martha a coronary!!!

  4. well i have to tell you this is the best post ever. ever. i love sarcasm, and this is just dripping! you have made my morning.

    i so appreciate you finding time to contribute to thankful thursdays. you really seemed to focus on the positive during a pretty tough week. that was wonderful to see, really! i can't believe you found your doctor eenie meenie style. awesome!

  5. LMAO! oops did i just use profanity?!?!
    You are cracking me up Erin, loving this post! Thanks for joining my blog! I appreciate all of your comments. Seems as though our daughters share the same embarrassment for our "trash picking". I tell my daughter that I promise not to pick trash within 5 blocks of her school!

  6. Really funny Blog! Too Funny!!! And oh so true!!! She is a genius and its like when you watch a scary movie and cover your eyes but peek from between your fingers because you want to see more.

  7. Very funny post.Enjoyed reading it!

    I am a big fan of Martha Stewart.I loved the place cards.

  8. Amen sister! I couldn't agree with you more!

    Many Blessings,

  9. LOL- this is fabulous, but I do love what she did with those pine cones. Fabulous!

  10. Love your take on Martha, she can turn dirt into a thing of beauty! Regarding gourd bowls, rather than making them yourself, why not let me make one for you, go to to find already made, ready to craft, gourd bowls. I do the hard part, you make it your own.

  11. Hysterical! But I have loved Martha from the beginning, and not quietly either.